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Lucky Stiff by Lynn Ahrens and Stephen Flaherty
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Director
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Scott Conley
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Musical Director
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Steve Taranto
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| Choreography |
Renee Brooks, Scott Conley |
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Stage Manager
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Brenda Poteet
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Costumes
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Becky Fly
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Lights/Sound
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Terry Bivens
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Scenic Design
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Billy Worboys
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| Keyboard |
Ben Wilkenson |
| Percussion |
Donald Carp |
| Backstage |
Terry Poteet, Chuck Lovelace |
| Spot Light |
J.D. Sargent, Jeff Howell |
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CAST:
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Harry Witherspoon
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Slade Kyle |
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Annabel Glick
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Rhonda Greer |
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Vinnie Di Ruzzio
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Scott Conley |
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Luigi Gaudi
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Martin Meyer |
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Rita LaPorta
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Sarah Thrasher |
| The Dead Body |
Tim Pritchard |
| Ensemble Players |
Renee Brooks |
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Billy Worboys |
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Tom Cook |
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Esther Gray |
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William Ide |
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Lindsay Mitchell |
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Lucky Stiff
"Something funny’s going on," in Atlantic City. Rita LaPorta – legally blind – accidentally shoots Tony Hendon, but all is not lost because, "Where there’s a will there’s a way!"
Meanwhile, Harry Witherspoon is counting shoes in a dreary shoe shop in East Grinstead; taking inventory on a Friday night, dreaming about "going off to sea" but, unable to change, he’s just "going quietly insane."
That very moment a telegram arrives at his boarding house and, bewildering his landlady and other tenants, it’s for Harry. They decide to have a spot of tea with plenty of steam to open the envelope just in time for Harry to come home. The word of his uncle’s untimely demise sends him to the solicitor’s office where he learns that the uncle he never met has left him everything – Six Million Dollars!
The trouble is that Harry must swear to fulfill the terms of the will or all the money goes to the Universal Dog Home of Brooklyn. But six million is six million, and so Harry agrees to do what he must. His uncle’s will requires him to travel to Monte Carlo for a week – doesn’t sound so bad, right? But he must take along his uncle -- the dead one – and there’s the catch.
It seems Tony, Harry’s uncle, didn’t want anything to interrupt his vacation plans, not even his own death. So the reservations are made and Tony has had his taxidermist friend prepare his body for travel. Given the choice between letting the money go to the dogs or take his rather "stiff" uncle to the casinos, Harry makes his choice. "I’m going to Monte Carlo. With a corpse."
Rita confesses to her optometrist brother Vinnie Di Ruzzio that the random shooting wasn’t quite so random. It seems that Rita fell for Tony who was managing her husband’s casino, and that’s why she embezzled the six mil in diamonds. She went to Tony’s place and saw a woman leaving but, having forgotten her glasses, she aimed at the woman but shot Tony. Oops.
In the dining car of a train bound for Monte Carlo we find Harry singing to his dead uncle, it’s "Good to Be Alive." They meet Luigi Gaudi, who introduces Harry and his uncle to some ladies and offers to show them the town. Overhead, Rita and Vinnie fly toward Monte Carlo, asking after all their troubles what else could go wrong. The plane starts to dive and the oxygen masks come down. Still, "It’s good to be alive!"
Later, at the Hotel de Paris everyone is particularly friendly to Harry’s uncle and the friendlier they are, the more Harry shakes. How can he survive the week with only his dead uncle as company? He starts the tape recorder and Tony tells him "Hell, I envy you, kid. You can see that view, and taste that caviar. And me? All I can do is sit and stare!"
So Harry resolves to think positive and sings that he’s, "glad to know that you’re so sure I’ll be fine / But I’ll need a lot of luck stuck with luck like mine." Outside Harry and his uncle meet Luigi and the ladies they met on the train. Unfortunately, their rooms are coincidentally right across the hall. Harry notices another woman who seems to be following them and confronts her. She’s Annabel Glick from the Universal Dog Home of Brooklyn and she’s determined to catch Harry in the slightest slip in following his Uncle’s will. One false step and the dogs get all the money! She sings Harry the big picture in "Dogs Versus You."
Back at the Nice airport, Rita, having survived the turbulence, is searching the yellow pages to find Harry. At the same time, Vinnie sings to his wife in "The Phone Call" that he won’t be home for dinner, and that, by the way, Rita’s husband might be trying to kill him. "It’s not funny," says he. He sings,
"It’s your birthday. Gee, I’m sorry.
It’s only a birthday!
So you’re forty?
I’m in Europe
with no wallet
with my sister
who is crazy."
Rita finds Harry’s hotel and the chase is on!
Harry shows his Uncle Tony around Monte Carlo, carefully following instructions on the tape with Annabel Glick in hot pursuit. "First, get me new clothes . . . and, hey, buy something nice for yourself, too." Next, they go gambling using Tony’s "infallible system," and to the museums. " . . . a great place to meet women! Ha ha!"
Rita and Vinnie arrive at the hotel and plan to search the city. Harry and Tony are off skydiving and deep-sea fishing.
Harry and Tony arrive at the Club Continentale followed by Annabel, and find Luigi and one of the ladies from the train already enjoying the show. They take their seats leaving an empty chair as specified on Tony’s tape. A drum roll. The emcee introduces Dominique Du Monaco in sequins, feathers and stilettos. She sings ,"What is Love if you don’t speak French . . . One basic lesson, I know is / Use your lips, / Use your hips / Like so."
She drags Harry from his seat and dances with plenty bumps and grinds and OOOHs and AAAHs. The whole place joins in singing and dancing . . . except Annabel. Dominique sits and flirts with Harry as Annabel sings "My idea of company / Would be a friendly face / That melts you with a grin. / At times like this / A girl could use . . .A dog."
Dominique and Harry and Tony leave, with Annabel close behind. Rita and Vinnie show up in Harry and Tony’s room; she’s dressed as a maid. Harry comes in and Rita and Vinnie hide; Annabel follows. He tells her that his uncle didn’t make any other plans for the night, so he’s going to try Tony’s infallible gambling system. They leave.
Rita is shocked to see the man she thought she killed looking so good and sings, "Fancy Meeting You Here." Maybe they could let bygones be bygones and start anew. Ending the song, she gives her chilly ex a hug and screams in horror!
At the casino, Harry’s at the roulette wheel surrounded by gamblers including Luigi and the girls and, of course, Annabel. He’s on a winning streak, thanks to his Uncle’s infallible system. Annabel chides him for being so shallow and he sings "Good to be Alive" explaining how he feels like a winner for the first time in his life. The croupier announces he’s won again as Rita appears behind him surreptitiously sticking a gun in his ribs "Mr. Witherspoon. You’re dead." Act I ends.
ACT TWO
Act Two opens in the Casino with a reprise of "Something Funny’s Going On Here". Vinnie enters finding Rita holding a gun in Harry’s ribs and struggles to get the gun. Bang!!! Harry and Annabel rush out. Rita screams "He’s got a gun!" The croupier grabs Vinnie and Rita runs off.
Harry tries to get into his room but he’s forgotten his key. The elevator bell sounds and he and Annabel duck behind a laundry cart, throwing a sheet over Uncle Tony. Rita, dressed as a maid, uses a master key to enter Harry’s room. A real maid enters – very drunk – and mistakes the sheet-covered Tony for her laundry basket. She wheels him off. Before Harry and Annabel notice what’s happened, Vinnie appears donning an English accent and bribes a bell boy into getting into Harry’s room. Coming out from behind the laundry cart, Harry and Annabel realize Tony is gone.
Bang!!! A gunshot rings out from Harry’s room. The door opens, Vinnie runs out, Harry and Annabel run away and Rita emerges with the gun: "Damn, I’ve gotta get this thing fixed."
Harry and Annabel rush around Monte Carlo looking for Uncle Tony, since neither of them gets a dime if the body is lost. To a passing bellhop they describe what they’re looking for in "Him, They, It, Her." In another part of town, Rita and Vinnie and Dominique, a nun and others join the number, all looking for Tony. As each looks away, the drunken maid wheels Tony through the background unnoticed.
Thinking all is lost, Harry and Annabel return to Harry’s room. A nun appears with a leper in a wheelchair: not Uncle Tony. Exhausted and late in the night the two regard each other. She rises to leave. He asks her to stay when suddenly a bellhop enters with an ornery Texan in wheelchair: again, not Uncle Tony.
They open some champagne, toast to their adventures and consider returning to their old lives in "Nice." They link arms for one last toast as the light fade.
Back at Harry’s old boarding house. A telegram arrives for Harry. The Landlady reads it and sings "Welcome back Mr. Witherspoon," chiding, "guess who let a bloody fortune slip right through a crack?" Vinnie enters: "You’re insane!" Rita sings, "Six million dollars or Die," and Luigi chimes in, "Should have played it cool." Dominique and Annabel enter with Uncle Tony who rises from his chair and leads a horrific kick line, singing, "We’d always knew you’d be back, someday."
Harry wakes from the dream in his room at the Hotel de Paris, flustered to find Annabel by his side, naked. She demurs, "I hope you don’t think I’m the kind of person who just goes out and . . . has fun."
A knock interrupts them. It’s the maid with Uncle Tony. They embrace. But Annabel withdraws abruptly, wrapping herself in the sheet. She’s off to the bathroom, and from the bathroom to Brooklyn. Harry sings "A Woman in My Bathroom," asking his Uncle how to get her to stay.
As Harry gets up the nerve, the door slams. It’s Rita with a gun. She wants her six million in diamonds. Harry hands her the box as she approaches Tony’s body proclaiming her love. "This is not Tony Hendon!"
She threatens to kill them unless they produce the real Tony. Harry reprises "Nice." As Rita takes aim, the door slams again, and a mysterious Arab enters who disarms Rita and removes his head dress to reveal Luigi Guadi who removes his mustache and becomes Tony Hendon! He explains that the corpse is his friend Luigi Guadi whom Tony found dead in his house. He assumed somebody was trying to kill him so he faked his own death using Luigi as ‘his’ corpse. In his dying breath Luigi had asked Tony to take his body to Monte Carlo and bury his heart at sea. The heart is in what was supposed to be the diamond box.
"Where are the diamonds?" Well, the diamonds are inside Luigi. Vinnie bursts in with Dominique, both dressed as maids. "You can only push an optometrist so far!" He wants the diamonds. Rita gives them the box and they, triumphant, rush out.
Tony turns to leave for a busy day with Luigi’s body. Harry stops him, asking, "What about all those starving dogs?" Tony gives Annabel a donation of $10,000 and Harry $500 and reminds Harry to use Luigi’s infallible system. Rita and Tony reprise "Fancy Meeting You Here," and leave together.
Harry and Annabel sing "Good to be Alive" and the curtain falls.
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